If you are going through a divorce, or seriously considering one, then you need the best people on your side. By best, I don’t mean the ones that will FIGHT it out on your behalf. You need people that are understanding of your specific situation. They must take step by step measures and develop specific plans for you that result in your peace of mind – soon. You might be talking to an attorney already and it’s the first step that many take. However, there are few things you should keep in mind even before picking an attorney.
Traditional attorneys are excellent in arguing their point. Many may spend their entire lives either prosecuting, defending and arguing . And in the process, their negotiation style is more like a “tug of war.” Their goal is to find the weaknesses in their “enemies” and win the upper hand in the negotiation via their version of a “logical” process that can be explained in paper or in court. Black or white.
You and I know that life doesn’t always work in absolutes like that. Are you or your spouse always right, really? It’s often a matter of finding the best solution looking at an issue from every possible angle, from everyone’s perspective. What you really need is perhaps someone who is trained and behaves more like a legal problem solver or an attorney who behaves more like a doctor or a counselor. And that’s exactly who an alternative law mediator is.
Mediators are specifically trained to develop best ideas win situations. Especially in cases of divorce, your emotions run high, logic can’t always easily prevail. Mediators take the time understand your thoughts and your emotions. And, best of all, they do the same with your spouse as well. They don’t try to guess who’s right or wrong. They are not here necessarily to fix all of your lives or advise you on how you should be handling your relationship either. They are there to help both of you understand your present circumstance or where you are; review your history or how you got there; and develop a realistic plan for the future or where you should go from here. Divorce mediators help make the process of divorce as peaceful as possible and find that right balance where both you and your spouse can settle without lengthy and expensive courtroom drama. Alternative Law and mediation are option for a quicker, less expensive and more effective resolutions.
The truth is that human beings are basically all very similar. Mediators try and tap into the good side of people – the better part that we all have, albeit honestly some more than others. The side that cares about justice, the side that wants to keep it fair. The side that knows in essence of it is not fair for the other side it will ultimately not work for either side.You and your spouse may not see eye to eye with each other, but the chances that you’ll agree on a fair settlement increase multi-fold when you have a neutral third party divorce mediator that has no bias but is strongly equipped with the training and the tools to make the process smooth and fair.
Divorce mediators don’t replace always replace attorneys or counselors. In many cases they can complement those services – and in fact, bridge dividing gaps between you, your spouse and your children or between the counselor and the attorney. Mediators can fall right in between those roles – a key place that many couples or unaware of or ignore. You would be wise to not make that mistake and consider divorce mediation or alternative law first. Remember you can always go to court as a last resort.